I was going to post yesterday on the first, but I worked at the museum in the morning, then came home and baked bread to take to Rik and Christy's for dinner. By the time I got home, I was tired.
The new year got off to a bit of a sad start. In the Dec. 31 post I talked about Bella the deer. She was put down early yesterday morning. I got there before the vet arrived so I could have one last hug and thank her for gracing my life.
I don't do resolutions, but intentions for a new year. Looking back at last year, my main one was not to push myself too hard socially. I succeeded pretty well in that, and I've been a lot calmer this year. Oddly, one intention this year is to be a bit more social, but with different expectations. In 2023 - my year of "putting myself out there" - the idea in my head is that I would be presenting myself and therefore Make New Friends. Click with someone, or a couple of someones. Find someone to have coffee with, or lunch sometimes, or to go hiking with or build something together or whatever. It didn't happen.
This year, if I do something, it's for the sake of doing it. I mentioned discovering the book club at the library just a mile or so away - I'll attend some of those meetings and see what I think. The community center (even closer) has a once-a-month "lunch and learn" lecture for seniors (nothing in January, but I think in February it will be on the Greek Olympics). I think the center also has a Thursday exercise class that I might check out. But the idea is that I will just attend the thing, without expectations (and therefore disappointments) that something will come of it.
Lean even more into reading, and where it will lead me. Ebaida and I started our friendship over reading. Jeff and I have been in touch with each other more after we started co-reading. I'm going to check out the local book club. Tallahassee also has a silent reading group that I want to attend (they all meet at a local coffee shop, chat for a half-hour, then shut up and read for an hour). For the last couple of years I've mostly read e-books, but I think I might start checking out more actual books from the library, just to be able to go in and say hi to a librarian.
Socially, I've found that I like the short random chats. I try to get the same checkout person at Publix - she recognizes me now. A waitress noticed me reading at lunch, and wanted to talk about the book she was reading (there's books again). The chat I had over butter at Publix, the salesperson at Spirit Halloween who loved puppets, or the beekeeper set up in a parking lot to sell honey. Unlike Trying To Make A Friend, those moments are easy to find; you just have to be open to them.
Self care wise, I'm doing pretty good. I eat well - mostly at home, but cooked. I've done two frozen pizzas this year, but no microwave foods. If I do takeout, it's Mrs. Afreen's home cooking from the gas station (she makes great butter chicken). I do get exercise: my walking challenges (I officially logged almost 1,000 miles last year), plus maintaining this place, and my work at the museum. Two area do need work: strength and cardio. I need to be able to lift the 50 pound bags of chicken food that I get (also sometimes I need to offload a 50 pound bag of feed at the museum) and it's getting to be a struggle. And I don't do much cardio - one of the reasons for my bad fall a couple of weeks ago is that I was walking a bit faster than normal. There are too many tripping hazards both here and at work. But I could use my rowing machine more.
Another intention is to live in more of my house. That sounds weird - but this is too much house for one person. I actually live in the kitchen, the den, the bedroom, and the bathroom. I rarely go into the living room. The back (guest room) and Bob's room just have stuff in them. The problem is - not living in those rooms means that somehow they get really dirty (cat hair and dust). And it just seems weird not to live in a whole house (even in the den, I have one place on the couch where I sit - that's where I use the laptop and have my meals).
Finally, I want to adjust my sleep schedule. I realize that I have developed a habit of staying up too late. I get tired, and then I sit on my spot on the couch and either scroll aimlessly through random FaceBook posts, play online Sudoku, or flip through YouTube videos (not watching them, just seeing what's available). And often end up doing that until after midnight, when I'm actually tired but like a little kid, too tired to get up and go to bed. It's also the time that I start feeling depressed, or snacking. But it means that I'm still tired in the morning, and it's not uncommon for me to get up, take care of the chickens and the cats, fix my breakfast, and then find myself playing on the laptop until around 11 a.m. when I fully wake up. I just need to close up for the night a little earlier. I'm experimenting, starting tonight. I have a reminder on my phone to chime at 9:45 and tell me to turn off the TV and laptop.
Which is in 5 minutes. Time to start working on the intentions.
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