I had pizza after the Harry Potter concert. That's hardly noteworthy, but it's one of those things that's so normal that it's completely strange.
When I got out of the concert, I was getting hungry. I was ready to go home, so I didn't feel like having a sit-down meal out anywhere. I didn't particularly feel like cooking (I don't keep things like microwave meals around, because to me they taste like the cardboard they came in).
It suddenly occurred to me that I could do take out. Pick up a pizza!!
That's hardly earth shattering. Except - when was the last time I did that? It would have had to be before Bob started chemo - so over four years. Things have changed; I found you don't call in an order anymore - you do everything on your phone, including paying, and then pick up at the drive through. Most people probably know that by now.
But I had takeout pizza, and it was good. Even cracked open a beer.
I took a woodworking class yesterday. I know the basics, but it's been a long time since I used anything more than the chop saw and a drill so I thought brushing up would be a good idea. It fell into the category of "getting out and doing something different." I also had a thought that it would be nice to spend an afternoon with some like-minded people - other makers - have some conversation. Maybe even go grab some dinner together afterwards.
That last part didn't quite work out, as I was the only student who showed up. But that gave me one-on-one instruction, and the goal was to use multiple tools - jig saw, table saw, scroll saw, drill press, while keeping all body parts intact.
It's more fun to learn if the pieces actually make something, so the class project was a bat box. A large, quite heavy, bat box. So now I have a big heavy bat box, which I do not need. I have so much natural habitat that bats have never moved into the two bat boxes I already have on the cottage. Now I need to find someone who wants a bat box.
So I had a good day yesterday, and the weather is nice and not hot, and I had planned to work on - something (halloween costume skirt, maybe some foam work) today, but have basically done diddly squat. I did the trash run, put away laundry, had a good talk with Mike and Margo. Spent way too much time on the laptop this morning because both RedBug and Stumbles were on my lap, and honestly, I was just enjoying it too much.
But energy level was low. I just didn't feel like moving. I think it was because I dreamed about Bob last night. We were at some sort of fair; we had gotten separated but I eventually found him. We were just walking, looking at displays. He paused at a table to talk with someone. I walked ahead a little bit and then waited for him. I had my back turned to him, and I was listening to the sound of his voice, the cadence of it. I wanted to turn around and look at him, but I was afraid that he wouldn't be there, so I just listened. And then woke up.
That's common when I dream of him (which isn't often enough). Even in my dreams, I know that he really isn't there. But it's the only way that I can see, hear, and sometimes touch him again. And it's the only way that I'll do anything with him, make new memories. So I tend to be quiet afterwards, just to hang onto the memory as long as possible (I also have a dream log, so I can remind myself later). It's not that I'm depressed - I just want to stay in the dream mode.
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